Dog Thefts

The previous owner of our property always used to warn us about the "gypsies" who would take anything that wasn't tied down. After four years here, I am now of the opinion that the gypsies are just used as scapegoats, because the French don't want to admit who the real theives are.

Their beloved dogs!

Yesterday, Attila stole my HAND SAW!!!! and one of my running shoes. He has either pawned them or buried them.

Just now, as soon as I sat down at the computer and had my back to him, he sneaked into the office (he's not allowed to come in the house but I had the kitchen door open) and took my favorite Faconable sandalthat he half devoured yesterday.

We irrigate our three walnut groves with an archaic system of above ground pipes that must be moved from row to row, grove to grove. Our neighboring walnut growers all have automatic sprinklers; but since our walnuts are a "loss leader" we aren't inclined to invest the Euros or the labor into installing the underground version. But maybe after a few years, the novelty of wrestling with large wet muddy pipes will wear off.

The other day, I was very proud of myself for having assembled the system for the first time, without the help of St. Roger. I had all the big pipes in place, and only needed to stick the MALE end cap into the last FEMALE pipe. But when I went back to the spot where I had left the end cap, it was gone. Naturally, when you're looking for a man to help you with chores, they're nowhere to be found.

I didn't suspect Attila of taking the end cap because it's metal and I assumed he would find it too big and heavy to fit in his mouth. I didn't remember that the end cap had a handle on it.

I must have walked the eqivalent of a couple kilometers looking for the end cap.

Giving up, I used my good old American ingenuity to dismantle the configuration and try another version that didn't require the male end cap.

Wrestling with the giant, unwieldy Tinkertoy set, I proudly came up with another layout that would include less trees, but was workable. To complete my new creation, I needed to retrieve one short piece that was over in the far corner of the grove.

Voila! When I reached the other side of the grove, I just happened to notice the silver male end cap laying in tall grass . . . waiting patiently, I suppose, for the day I would wreck the mower by driving over it.

Sooooo, I went and reconfigured the pipes. This exercize in futility and triumph took over two hours to accomplish.

I talked my husband into buying Attila claiming that the dog would help take care of the sheep. When I related the irrigation story over the phone to my husband he replied, "I don't trust anything that claims to be an enhancement to productivity."