It isn't a rat . . .

it's giant monkeys running around my kitchen at night. See the surveillance photo on the left.

I had complained to my husband that a rat was eating my bananas. The wise husband suggested that I hang the bananas from the pot rack that hangs from the ceiling in the kitchen.

I followed his advice, and this morning, after gingerly picking my way down the hallway to avoid two piles of dog poop and one pile of dog vomit, I entered the closed kitchen; and there, to my great horror, was the bunch of bananas, lying on the floor, with two of them eaten . . .only the skins remained.

The French word for vomit is: vomi.